TIME TO STOP SCREAMING TO BE HEARD
Sometimes it feels good to SCREAM, to let off steam. But it rarely affects change. Well, life's gotten too full of scream, steam and mean memes. There's a lot of anger in and around us. We SHOUT in families, churches, sometimes through road rage. But, nowhere more than in politics. However, here's some good news. As an alternative to "fighting like hell," we accelerate "fighting like heaven." Remember? But listen carefully, it's quieter. Softer. In Proverbs 15:1 we read, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger."(NLT)
So, we need to learn to speak softer and listen harder. And we need to know where to turn for words of encouragement and wisdom for this battle against evil forces. Not faces. Like I wrote in my last post, we must arm ourselves with weapons of mass instruction. For me, my primary source is the Bible. And a close look at the words and works of Jesus.
Well, our book group just finished reading and discussing, A Burning In My Bones, the biography of Eugene Peterson, translator of The Message. For many who struggle to understand the Bible, the Living Bible or The Message translation help with fresh language for old truths.
So, when we left Gordon College in 2011, Jud and I gave each graduate a copy of The Message translation of the New Testament. We knew they were entering a world where they needed reminders of heaven's resources. But also, some personal encouragement for what was ahead. So we made a bookmark to tuck inside, thanks to talented folks in Gordon College's PR and Printing departments.
Since these were, sort of, our last words, we prayed about what to include. We wanted both God's words and some of ours. So we chose verses from The Message and personal words to exhort and encourage. We knew that Gordon grads were entering a world of opposition and opportunity. Jud chose Ephesians 6:13-14, "Be prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it's all over but the shouting you'll still be on your feet." Then, Jud added, "The tests aren't over but neither is God's purpose for you. Be strong in His power and faithful to His call. Shalom."
My choice was, "Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns...It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life." (Philippians 4:6-7) Then, I added, "Your everyday life matters. Stay faithful. Act justly and kindly. Listen long. Be grateful. Speak with truth and grace. Love much. Forgive. Serve well. Laugh often. Hope always. Sing anyway."
Reading these, again, left me smiling at how our personalities came through our choices and words. Jud direct, truthful, and succinct. I used more words and feelings. But today, as I write, I recall what we were going through personally, especially Jud, when we chose those verses. For both of us leaving Gordon College was hard. We, like those graduating seniors, were facing a lot of unknowns. Jud, with cancer, was "up against more than (he) could handle on (his) own..." And I needed to hear, "Don't fret or worry...pray."
Well, this past Wedndesday, October 1st(Jud's birthday), the reading in Eugene Peterson's, Praying with the Psalms, was from Psalm 119:11: "I treasure your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." Jud did. Me, too.Then Peterson wrote, "The heart well-stocked with God's word is like a well-armed arsenal. Confident in the strength of its weaponry, it is fearless in the face of attacks from without or insurrection from within."
But on October 2nd in the same book, Peterson wrote, "When we find ourselves deficient in wisdom, it is not because the Word of God has pages missing but because we have not seen all there is on the pages we already have." So, my dear family and friends , lets put down the weapons of mass destruction. Lets stop fighting like hell. Instead, lets fight like heaven, and arm ourselves with the wisdom that comes from the Bible. Lets speak softly God's Good News into this LOUD, wounded world. I, like you, am weary of words that shame, blame, belittle, degrade, brag, incite, curse or confuse.
For sure, there's a better way. It begins with choosing words that bless, not curse. Imagine words spoken softly and with love? And imagine that they're so softly spoken we must come closer together. Why? Because we don't want to miss a single life-giving word.
So, love risks looking soft.
Why?
Because, ultimately, we know that Love wins.
So, what are we willing to risk for Love's sake?
"
11 Comments
I loved this so much! Speak softer and listen harder, choosing words that bless, not curse. Speak words softly and with love - great advice in fighting like heaven! And the words you and Jud put in the bookmarks for the grads is so precious - I need to write them down on my own bookmark. Thank you for this post filled with wisdom from Above dear Jan. Love you!
Oh, and I love you and Steve and your family, dear Wendy. If Chad or one of my Grands will help me, I'll send photos of the bookmark in my next post. Meanwhile, speak softly and love heartily.
Hey, Kathy Russ here. Dan and I have recently listened to the book by Geraldine Brook about the death of her husband. I thought of you because of your use of scream.
Thank you, dear Kathy. Good to hear from you (and Dan). No, I haven't read the book but I'm no longer in the screaming phase when it comes to Jud's death. I just miss him a lot, cry sometimes when I hear a familiar song or come across something that belonged to him, but mostly I'm left with deep gratitude for all we had for more than 51 years. And I have a settled peace knowing where he is, along with the hope of joining him one day. A sudden death of a spouse, like the author experienced, is a harder journey. No opportunity to say goodbye. But thank you for responding to the blog. Hope you and Dan are doing well in Colorado.
Dear Jan, I was at a visitation for a friend at church last night. At our age it's either a funeral or a hot dog at Costco.
However, as several people were sharing with the surviving spouse that his wife was in great shape with Jesus, he said he knew that but when he called her name she did not answer. I know you know that grief is real and that believers grieve but not like those who have no hope. However, we do and should grieve. And while the scream might now be a whisper, it is not one that should be silenced but shared. Brother Dale
Yes, my dear friend and brother Dale. For me, the blog has been a place to share many emotions, and sometimes a SCREAM. But, I no longer scream about the loss of hearing Jud's voice. But I do miss the part of me that is missing. Oh, but friends and family(and The Church, for me) are such a precious and important part of daily strength and healing for all the hurts we each carry, wounds visible and hidden. You and Marty have been like personal healers for me for decades. Like RX: Dale and Marty. Thank you. You're in my daily prayers. Is it helping? Well, there's always a hot dog at Costco.
Amen- wept through your truths! You are not only a friend but a ‘minister’ to me!!!!
My dear Candy, we minister to each other when we listen hard and speak softly. Carry on. You make a difference. A good one.
Here! Here! I just wish those who need to hear these words would read your thoughts. We are all at such a loud volume today that we don’t listen to the opinions of others. All we can do is pray!
When you wrote, "allea we can do is pray", dear Jill, it reminded me of a a visit with Madeleine L'Engle, author of A Wrinkle in Time and many other great books. She was speaking at Gordon College. At some point in a Q & A session, someone made the comment about a situation and said,"Well, I guess all we can do is pray." Madeleine smiled and said, "Has it finally come to that!" When you say all we can do is pray, I catch that prayer matters to you. But prayer is hard work because we keep on , even when we don't see results. It is what Christ modeled in the toughest of times and our most powerful weapon. So all of us need to pray and trust God. We can also make a difference when it comes to voting. Faith and works, prayer and trust. Thank you so much for reading and writing a response, dear Jill Both take courage. Pray on! i'm praying with you. And heavenly hosts are praying,too. We've got backup!!